Vouchers for Me

There's a lot of "voucher" talk in Oklahoma and other parts of the country right now. Special "savings accounts" are being suggested by some legislative folk for investing public tax dollars into private ventures. I kind of like this idea, so here are some of the pet projects for which I'd like to gain access to some of that "voucher" money:

• I don't like the routes that I feel compelled to take to get to work or to the grocery store or to church. I feel like they are overly crowded, often take me out of my way somewhat, and just don't provide the service I need. I would like an Expressway Savings Account so as to help fund private roads to get me to the places I need to get.

• I don't care too much for the options of free DVD rentals I am able to get at the local public library. I understand that I have two different municipal library organizations, each with many branches, for me to use but the options they have are just too limiting. I can get so many more options through the private online business Netflix. If only I had an Entertainment Savings Account then I would be able to watch the latest and greatest in viewing options available.

• It's a pesky double-edged sword with those libraries. Not only are their DVD offerings free, but so are their books. I like to read! But, there are only so many books that one building can own. This simply stifles my enlightenment opportunities. I would love to have a voucher program which would enable me to gain greater enlightenment through all of the offerings available through Barnes and Noble; after all, B&N not only has the big box store opportunities, but they also have online options which significantly multiple the enlightenment that I can gain. I need the legislature to approve my Erudite Savings Account.

I am sure there are many more special "savings accounts" or voucher programs that I can think of, but I need to grab dinner before heading out to watch my students play in their high school basketball games. My ultimate point is that it just seems silly for the government to compel me to pay for those private things I want in life rather than reimbursing me my tax dollars if I'm not using their public service. It seems like a no-brainer, right?

I hope my readers can easily pick up the sarcasm that I'm laying down. These roads, these libraries, these other public services have such a greater significant impact than simply my personal qualms. The same is true for public education and all of these voucher programs, disguised as "Educational Savings Accounts" which seek to take money away from the already underfunded public school system (which is a clear obligation of the state government to provide) and fund private schools. I'm sure I'll write more about the questionable legality/constitutionality of these ESA/voucher efforts. But for now, I just hope you're able to get a peak into the absurdity of the notion to begin with.